How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
