It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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