actually, I'm a sock model
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i already hear my dad disowning me
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize