I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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