He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I party with great urgency now.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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