i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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