Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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