Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
