no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
More tranny stories later!
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
