Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize