READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
