Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
