UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize