So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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