I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
