how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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