Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize