Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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