i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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