I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
