Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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