so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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