No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
