How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
