i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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