so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
