so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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