Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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