if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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