I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
