So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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