he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Randomize
