my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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