It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
