I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
