Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
