people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Your cock deserves a montage
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
