I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
We left the knife in your bed.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I think my moral compass just broke
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