The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
