I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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