Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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