Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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