My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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