U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
