Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
What a dumb baby whore.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize