Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
