so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize