I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
