I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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