I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
