Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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