p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
